A hypothetical situation where 20 CEOs board an airplane and are told that the flight that they are about to take is the first-ever to feature pilotless technology:
It is an uncrewed aircraft.
Each one of the CEOs is then told, privately, that their company's software is running the aircraft's automatic pilot system.
Nineteen of the CEOs promptly leave the aircraft, each offering a different type of excuse.
One CEO alone remains on board the jet, seeming very calm indeed.Asked why he is so confident in this first uncrewed flight.
He replies : "If it is the same software that runs my company's IT systems, this plane won't even take off." !!!!
That is called Confidence!!!
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Cheers...!!!
At a doctor's shop one morning a patient arrives complaining of serious backache.
The doctor examines him and asks him "What the hell did you doto your back?
"The patient replies "You know that I work for a local night club?
Today morning I got home to my apartment early and heard a noise in mybedroom. On entering I knew someone had been sleeping with my wife and the balcony door was open. I rushed out the balcony door and did not find anyone.
As looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he wasdressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him. That's how I strained my back"
The 2nd patient arrives looking as if he has been in a car wreck. The doctor says "My previous looked bad, but you look terrible.
What the hell happened to you?"
He replies, "You know I have been unemployed for a while now. Today wasthe first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and was running late.I was running out of the building, getting dressed at the same time, and you won't believe it but I was hit by a fridge."
The 3rd patient arrives; he looks even worse than the other two patients do. The doctor is shocked.
Again asks, "What the hell happened to you?"
"Well I was sitting in a fridge & someone threw it from the 3rd floor!"
The doctor examines him and asks him "What the hell did you doto your back?
"The patient replies "You know that I work for a local night club?
Today morning I got home to my apartment early and heard a noise in mybedroom. On entering I knew someone had been sleeping with my wife and the balcony door was open. I rushed out the balcony door and did not find anyone.
As looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he wasdressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him. That's how I strained my back"
The 2nd patient arrives looking as if he has been in a car wreck. The doctor says "My previous looked bad, but you look terrible.
What the hell happened to you?"
He replies, "You know I have been unemployed for a while now. Today wasthe first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and was running late.I was running out of the building, getting dressed at the same time, and you won't believe it but I was hit by a fridge."
The 3rd patient arrives; he looks even worse than the other two patients do. The doctor is shocked.
Again asks, "What the hell happened to you?"
"Well I was sitting in a fridge & someone threw it from the 3rd floor!"
Lighter side up
This is a collection of leave letters and applications written by people in various places of India ...
1. Infosys, Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave.
2. This is from Oracle Bangalore:From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son:"as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.."
3. Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
4. From H.A.L. Administration dept:"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."
5. Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"
6. An incident of a leave letter"I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday."
7. A leave letter to the headmaster:"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
8. Another leave letter written to the headmaster:"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."
9. Covering note:"I am enclosed herewith..."
10. Another one:"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."
11. Actual letter written for application of leave:"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husbandat home I may be granted leave".
12. Letter writing: -"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well."
1. Infosys, Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave.
2. This is from Oracle Bangalore:From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son:"as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.."
3. Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
4. From H.A.L. Administration dept:"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."
5. Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"
6. An incident of a leave letter"I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday."
7. A leave letter to the headmaster:"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
8. Another leave letter written to the headmaster:"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."
9. Covering note:"I am enclosed herewith..."
10. Another one:"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."
11. Actual letter written for application of leave:"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husbandat home I may be granted leave".
12. Letter writing: -"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well."
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Dumb and Dumber
Sardarji is in a Quiz Contest trying to win prize money of Rs.1 crore.
The questions are as follows:
1) How long was the 100 yr war?
A) 116
B) 99
C) 100
D) 150
Sardar says "I will skip this"
2) In which country are the Panama hats made?
A) BRASIL
B) CHILE
C) PANAMA
D) EQUADOR
Sardar asks for help from the University students
3) In which month do the Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
A) JANUARY
B) SEPTEMBER
C) OCTOBER
D) NOVEMBER
Sardar asks for help from general public
4) Which of these was King George VI first name?
A) EDER
B) ALBERT
C) GEORGE
D) MANOEL
Sardar asks for lucky cards
5) The Canary islands, in the Pacific Ocean , has its name based on which animal:
A) CANARY BIRD
B) KANGAROO
C) PUPPY
D) RAT
Sardar gives up.
If u think you are indeed clever and laughed at Sardar's replies, then please check the answers below:
1) The 100 year war lasted 116 years from 1337-1453
2) The Panama hat is made in Equador
3) The October revolution is celebrated in November
4) King George's first name was Albert. In 1936 he changed his name.
5) Puppy. The Latin name is INSULARIA CANARIA which means islands of the puppies.
Now tell me who's the dumb one....Don't ever laugh at a Sardar again.
The questions are as follows:
1) How long was the 100 yr war?
A) 116
B) 99
C) 100
D) 150
Sardar says "I will skip this"
2) In which country are the Panama hats made?
A) BRASIL
B) CHILE
C) PANAMA
D) EQUADOR
Sardar asks for help from the University students
3) In which month do the Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
A) JANUARY
B) SEPTEMBER
C) OCTOBER
D) NOVEMBER
Sardar asks for help from general public
4) Which of these was King George VI first name?
A) EDER
B) ALBERT
C) GEORGE
D) MANOEL
Sardar asks for lucky cards
5) The Canary islands, in the Pacific Ocean , has its name based on which animal:
A) CANARY BIRD
B) KANGAROO
C) PUPPY
D) RAT
Sardar gives up.
If u think you are indeed clever and laughed at Sardar's replies, then please check the answers below:
1) The 100 year war lasted 116 years from 1337-1453
2) The Panama hat is made in Equador
3) The October revolution is celebrated in November
4) King George's first name was Albert. In 1936 he changed his name.
5) Puppy. The Latin name is INSULARIA CANARIA which means islands of the puppies.
Now tell me who's the dumb one....Don't ever laugh at a Sardar again.
The Power Of Rajinikanth.....
There is a popular story saying that wherever you go, you will find at least one Rajinikanth fan.Here is an interesting new story.
Rajinikanth was bragging to Jayalalitha one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."Tired of his boasting, Jayalalitha called his bluff, "OK, Rajini how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it" Rajini said.
So Rajini and Jayalalitha fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts"Thalaiva! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!".
Although impressed, Jayalalitha is still skeptical.After they leave Cruise's house, she tells Rajini that she thinks Rajini knowing Cruise was just lucky."No, no, just name anyone else" Rajini says."President Bush", Jayalalitha quickly retorts."Yes", Rajini says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington ".And off they go.
At the White House, Bush spots Rajini on the tour and motions him , saying, "Rajini, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up". Well, Jayalalitha is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.After they leave the White House grounds, he implores her to name anyone else.
"The Pope," Jayalalitha replies."Sure!" says Rajini, "My folks are from Germany and I've known the Pope a long time".So off they fly to Rome .
Rajini and Jayalalitha are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Rajini says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope.
"And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican .Sure enough, half an hour later Rajini emerges with the Pope on the balcony.But by the time Rajini returns, he finds that Jayalalitha has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to Jayalalitha's side, Rajini asks her, "What happened?"Jayalalitha looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said,
"Who's that on the balcony with Rajini?"
Rajinikanth was bragging to Jayalalitha one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."Tired of his boasting, Jayalalitha called his bluff, "OK, Rajini how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it" Rajini said.
So Rajini and Jayalalitha fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts"Thalaiva! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!".
Although impressed, Jayalalitha is still skeptical.After they leave Cruise's house, she tells Rajini that she thinks Rajini knowing Cruise was just lucky."No, no, just name anyone else" Rajini says."President Bush", Jayalalitha quickly retorts."Yes", Rajini says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington ".And off they go.
At the White House, Bush spots Rajini on the tour and motions him , saying, "Rajini, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up". Well, Jayalalitha is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.After they leave the White House grounds, he implores her to name anyone else.
"The Pope," Jayalalitha replies."Sure!" says Rajini, "My folks are from Germany and I've known the Pope a long time".So off they fly to Rome .
Rajini and Jayalalitha are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Rajini says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope.
"And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican .Sure enough, half an hour later Rajini emerges with the Pope on the balcony.But by the time Rajini returns, he finds that Jayalalitha has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to Jayalalitha's side, Rajini asks her, "What happened?"Jayalalitha looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said,
"Who's that on the balcony with Rajini?"
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